Love is something you want to feel and experience.
What is LOVE?
Love is strong affection, attraction, admiration, benevolence, warmth & devotion towards someone or something.
You crave love, yet the catch 22 is: until you love yourself, you’ll never be able to fully love another or receive love from another.
You might not know exactly HOW to do that - it sounds great, but WHAT DOES THAT REALLY MEAN?
How can you love yourself?
If you grew up in a difficult environment, it may seem like you’re just stuck with negative emotions toward yourself and others.
My client, Abby, had her mother living with her and she was not happy. Her mother stirred up old wounds and memories from childhood that resulted in Abby being angry and resentful all the time.
Her mother always “shut her up” when she tried to express herself - what she wanted or needed- and told her to be grateful for what she had - how lucky she was.
All her life, Abby’s had difficulty feeling like she’s heard by those in her life - her daughter, ex-husband, etc.
Abby does not have much compassion or love for herself. She loves her mother AND resents her and has no patience with her. She feels frenetic and unhinged being around her.
Abby is beginning to realize that loving herself is her first priority and unless she’s making herself heard and honoring her own magnificence, she is unable to see the people in her life in the present, not the past.
Every time Abby looks at someone in her life, she sees how they were & how they treated her in the past. It makes her feel unlovable - and she wants to put an end to it...
She also sees that by holding onto the anger and resentment from the past, she’s unable to experience her life and the life of others in the present. Everything is seen through a filter from the past.
What does living in the past keep you from?
How can you admire yourself, bring benevolence, warmth and devotion to yourself? How can you be affectionate to yourself?
Some things that have helped me are:
#1 Learn to forgive yourself for everything at all times. This will bring you to a spiritual place. You have to work at it and be dedicated to strengthening this muscle. Everytime you want to beat yourself up - just stop it. There is nothing you have done, or will do that you can’t be forgiven for.
#2 Write down everything that works about you. Be bold, be proud, brag. What do you like about your body? What do you like about your personality or values? What have you done right in your life? What would your friends say works about you? What are you proud of?
#3 Ask yourself, What nurtures me or what makes me feel good or special - and fill your life with these things.
Examples: Who do you love to connect with? - create consistent times to be together (mostly on Zoom now), what do you love to do - reading, sewing, yoga, etc. - get it structured into your life.,
What do you love to eat? - make it or buy it.
What else makes you feel loved? - massage, candle lit bath, sauna, etc. - get them scheduled.
If none of these things work, it’s not your fault.
You simply have some programming in your subconscious mind that keeps negative thinking and acting patterns in place. This programming can be altered.
Literally I watch people every day melt away their past patterns and start to live the life they’re craving.
You can have this too. It’s not that these people are special - it’s that they’re willing to try a new option!
It’s time for you to learn more. To get past those patterns. Schedule a Free Psych-K session with me, and enjoy the immediate relief that most of my clients experience...
I am the owner of SageThink: Inner Alignment. I help people discover negative beliefs that hold them back in various areas of their lives and rewrite those beliefs so that they experience freedom and power to fulfill their dreams in life.